Fasting or Monetary Incentives: The Extremes of Charity and Justice

This year, as a lenten practice, I am reading a daily reflection about a different saint each day.  This morning, it was about Sharbel Makhluf, a 19th century Lebanese monk who spent the last half of his life as a hermit. He is known for both his fasting and his care for others. He would leave his hermitage routinely to go care for villagers. The prayer suggested for today is "God of our fasting, show us how our hunger unites with those in need of bread, how letting go of life's comforts can aid those lacking necessities for life."  

Then I turned to Dan Pallotta's daily hit from his book "Uncharitable."  Dan is the founder of Pallotta Teamworks, was a pioneer in fundraising via AIDSRides/Cancer Walks, and was an inspiring visionary. I still remember clearly the first time I heard him, in July 1996 on the first day of the Twin Cities-Chicago AIDSRide, challenging everyone that we could end the AIDS pandemic within a decade. I think he was right in the vision, but unfortunately and ironically, there was too much money invested in and to be made from AIDS to allow for the creative innovations to make it happen. 

Today's "hit": "An ambitious reporter puts a sentimental photo of a child with leukemia in the newspaper and asks, 'How can you be so cruel as to want to earn a profit from his situation?' I put up the photos of a million others like him and ask, How can you be so shortsighted as to deny me and a thousand others the monetary incentive it would take to devote our life’s work to helping these children? You have just robbed them of our talents. What if your moral compass is wrong?"  

These two represent the polar ends of the spectrum of the cultural and institutional realities of the social justice/charity/advocacy world. At William Penn House (where we work for beans), we get groups that want us to set up service programs for them but sometimes they have trouble seeing why they should pay us a fee as they are doing charity. I would love to double the Workcamp fee so that WPH could have a cushion, a bit of security and I would be able to perhaps save a bit for the future. And I see many colleagues in the field in much the same boat.  It sometimes feels like because we work in this field, we are expected to live like St. Makhluf.  

On the other hand, I see why people are concerned about the money made in charity work. I see and know people making well over 6 figures (some more around half a million).  They are happy; the donors - often the deep pockets of the Clinton/Gates/Bono realm - are happy. The workers fly in high circles. They are very good at raising money, creating good images, marketing, etc, but are the donors really getting the best bang for the buck? Do people enter these jobs fueled by their passions for the cause, or by the lure of the paycheck? How many dollars are spent in meetings to no end? Even being a part of the DC HIV Prevention Planning Group, a non-paid position, I suspect that we meet to meet, but actually do very little. I'm working on that one. 

It really boils down to the tension between ego and grace. For me, personally, I don't think I could ever live the life of Makhluf, Francis, or countless others. Even in my daily life, I stand in awe at the life of grace of some of the people I know. In one case, this life of having and needing little (and this is with someone who gave up much to do his ministry) is essential.  And yet, I firmly believe that the more one has attachments to things that can be bought with wealth, the more the ego gets fed, and this inevitably is a problem.  Just look at how Dan's quote ends.  He basically is saying that if I don't get paid what I want, it's your fault for robbing people of my gifts. The immorality is yours.  

It's fair enough to do what we can so that people can make a living, and I think it's fair enough to negotiate what an equitable wage is, and what is too much, and through this tension we can get the biggest bang for the buck. To me it boils down to this: fair and decent wages are good - perhaps essential, but getting rich off the backs of the poor and the sick is not. 

Recent Lessons in Humility

“The life that intends to be wholly obedient, wholly submissive, wholly listening, is astonishing in its completeness. Its joys are ravishing, its peace profound, its humility the deepest, its power world-shaking, its love enveloping, its simplicity that of a trusting child.” - Thomas Kelley

“What does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?” - Micah 6:8

During the past week, I have thought a lot about humility and what it means, because in the last week, several friends have canceled prearranged plans due to either snow or personal emergencies. None of this has bothered me. Life happens, yeah some of the plan changes threw off my schedule a little, but all of the cancellations actually gave me more time to breathe, so they were gifts in disguise.

One friend has repeatedly apologized for her not showing up at an event that we planned together. She had let me know before the event, so I knew about it as soon as she knew she couldn't make it. I have been in her shoes several times feeling like I have let people down when stuff happen to me. But life happens no matter if my calendar had something else planned.

Then this past weekend, a major snowstorm hit DC hard. It snowed straight for more than 24 hours and dumped more than two feet of snow. I was supposed to attend a retreat this weekend, but it was canceled the day before due to the weather forecast. One of the organizers was upset at this; a feeling which I totally understand. Similar things have happen to me and I have felt that same feeling of being upset that I just spent so much time planning something that will never happen and I have felt defeated like I had spent all that time for nothing.

Now I see all of these times during the past week and beyond as ways to keep myself humble, because it just reminds me that no matter how much I plan or try to control my life, something bigger than me is always in control. I believe that God has plans for me and God will reveal them to me little by little. Living on God's time is not easy and being humble is not always simple. It requires putting aside my ego and fully submitting to a greater power. When I have, amazing things have happen, like finding my dream job. Thomas Kelly's quote resonates with my few experiences when I obeyed and submitted. I have felt more alive during these times, because I had been fully present during these times.

Part of the weekend, I was unexpectedly snowed in at a friend's house a couple miles away. I had wanted to weather the storm in my house where I had stocked up on food, but the snow came down faster than I had thought and I was stuck. That night, as I was snowed in, I watched the Bill Maher's documentary, Religulous that my friends had from Netflix. For much of the film, he mocks organized religion. Several times he asks hard questions and the interviewee cannot answer, such as Couldn't the writers of The Bible made everything up? He uses this as proof that organized religion is a clutch for the week-minded.

As I watched the film, I felt like I had no answers to many of the questions he asked. I started to think, maybe I am weak in my faith and Bill has a good point. But I realized faith isn't about answering questions, but about believing in something far greater than myself. I have known God experientially, not through answering questions.

Part of humility for me is knowing that I do not always have quick and ready answers to questions about my faith and I should not pretend that I do. I continue to ask myself many hard questions daily: Was it in God's plans to have a snow storm this weekend or does God control the weather really? Or why did the earthquake hit Haiti and kill 100,000 people while I am living safely in a warm house in the richest country with a nice job? Are these events really part of God's plans? Like I said before, I do not know any answers to these hard questions and I won't attempt to answer these questions, but what I do know is that I have felt God working in my life before and I know that God is still working in my life, so I will continue everyday trying, as Micah suggested thousands years ago, 'to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God'.